The summer of 1993. It was the year I graduated from junior high. The year was a blur of activities and uncertainty about what high school would be like. During the last month, we had a class trip to Great America. I was so excited, I remember checking my closet for the perfect thing to wear. I couldn’t find anything I wanted, so I begged my mom to take me to Miller’s Outpost to get me some new clothes. Yes, I know it sounds like an old-timey store, but it wasn’t. You read the word “outpost” and probably think this place sells animal fur, pure leather boots, and necklaces with alligator teeth on them but honestly teens went there to shop for stuff.
Me: Mom, can we go to Miller’s Outpost and get some clothes?
Mom: Why not Wal-Mart? They have clothes there…
Me: No, because last time you bought me four pairs of shorts with a different Disney Character on each of them. I don’t think I will look cool going to Great America with shorts that have Donald Duck on the side of them. That outfit doesn’t say “Hey, yeah, my mom doesn’t pick my clothes.”
Yes, I was a very sarcastic kid.
But, we did go to Miller’s Outpost.
The next day was the trip. The class hopped on a big yellow bus and drove to Great America. I had a huge fear of heights so I had to come up with fake excuses on why I couldn’t ride rides without looking like a chicken.
Friends: Dude, c’mon ride this with us.
Me: I can’t, all the money I brought is in quarters in dimes..so if I ride Top Gun, it could fly out and I would like have no money for food and stuff. And then I would have to try to borrow money from you guys..and we would all have no money.
Near the end of the day, one of my friends walked up to this kiosk. He stood there for 10 minutes and waved us over.
Friend: Hey, let’s make a video!
Me: What? Of what?
Friend: I don’t know…you pick a song and we make a music video. We can all be in.
Me: Dude, looks crazy expensive.
Friend: I’ll pay for it.
We were sold. So me and my friends jumped into this booth to make a music video. We had no clue what we were going to do in the video. The friend who paid for the whole thing chose the song…and this was the song.
We didn’t get time to practice any dance moves…no synchronized Cabbage Patch or Roger Rabbit. Don’t know what that is? Look at this:
So we had no clue what to do when the song started. Once the music started, we started to try to lip-sync the lyrics…and we failed miserably. Every person in the video wanted to rap and some of us had no rhythm. There were times when one of us would try to dance but the rest of us would just stand there and laugh at the person dancing. By the middle of the song, we got tired. So, we kinda just stood there and watched the camera. Yes, it was very un-Kriss Kross-like. If Daddy Mac or Mac Daddy saw this video, they would have been embarrassed. When we were done, the person who worked the counter handed us two VHS tapes. Not sure who they were handed to, but I hope those have been lost and never found. That video has made appearances after that day…and at the worst times. It was brought to a few class house parties and even made a cameo appearance years later during a Driver’s Education class. Not sure, how that got there. But something tells me that I haven’t seen the last of that tape.