A new year brings about new goals and challenges. And with me, resolutions that I break within a week or two. I had the typical “lose weight” or “eat better” resolution, but those usually end in a hot greasy mess due to a sudden craving for everything bad from McDonald’s. I struggled to figure out what my resolution would be for this upcoming year. But two situations in the past two weeks pointed me in the direction I needed to go.
During my first years in college I spent most of my time in front of a screen playing video games to destress. I didn’t party…didn’t drink. Video games were the perfect end to a crazy social day of skipping class. A friend of mine told me of an online game called Ultima Online. I joined and I was hooked. I spent late night fighting dragons and hanging out with my new found friends that I made because of this game. That’s where I met Victor. He became a good friend of mine. I stopped playing Ultima Online eventually, but kept my friendship with Victor. He would call me and ask for advice and tell me about the things that were going on in his life. He would check in every few months to see how I was doing. He even visited me for a week because he was going to be in the states to visit his parents (he lived in Australia.) We lost touch for a few years but reunited through Facebook. He updated me on how his life was. He seemed very happy. Then a few weeks ago, he decided the world was too much for him. I was crushed. It didn’t make sense. There aren’t many people that I have known for 16 years…and I still can’t believe he is gone. Sometimes we rely on things that are on the “surface”, we say hi and have small talk…we ask about how people are, how their lives are, how work is, how school is…but that’s “surface talk.” A person can smile on the outside and hurt on the inside. How many times do we say things but feel something totally different inside? As a writer, I love stories…especially life stories. I love hearing about experiences that people go through. So this resolution, won’t be as tough as it should.
“Go past surface talk to understand and deepen relationships.”
Words are simple. But can be life-changing, they can raise a person up, and tear them up forever. An extra effort in conversation can do wonders and help a person heal. There are words that still affect me to this day. They bring bad memories of verbal and physical abuse. I try not to linger on such memories because I have never fully healed from those experiences. Humans need each other. They need the ability to express their feelings through conversation. A few extra minutes of conversation can teach us something, can bring us a much needed laugh, and bring sunshine on a dreary day.
The second resolution was inspired by my daughter. On Christmas day, she opened one of her presents and said, “this is the best day ever!”
On New years eve, she asked me, “Daddy can I watch cartoons after I eat dinner?” I replied yes…and she said “this is the best day ever.”
And yesterday, she asked, “can I have another cookie?” I said yes. And she said, “this is the best day ever.”
It made me chuckle. Of course, we all have visions of what our “best day ever” was. But, it made me wonder. What if we looked at every day as a possible “best day ever?” We wake up every day and have our normal routine.We expect the same things. We expect to go to work….to school…to come home…to go to sleep. Imagine just driving to work and hitting all green lights. And thinking, “wow…best day ever.” It seems trivial, but we will start to notice the little things that make us happy and bring us joy. Do that enough, and we would start to appreciate how blessed we truly are and what things we take for granted.
“Look at every day as a possible “best day ever.”
I heard a quote from a rapper named Pitbull that really hit home. I’m not really into this guy’s music but he is constantly positive.
“Every day we wake up above ground is a good day.” And just for kicks….here is his latest video.