The Foodth of July

I clocked out on friday and was all smiles. I knew I was going to hit traffic, but I didn’t care. I was exhausted but I jumped out of work with the enthusiasm of a kid entering Toys “R” Us. It was hot so I knew my car was going to be crazy hot inside. If a car has been baking for 8 hours, there is a chance that you might get a case of “metal part of seatbelt is so hot that it burns off your nipple-itis.” But, I didn’t care. A fun weekend was ahead. And it started it off great…there was no traffic…and I got home with both nipples unburnt by hot seatbelts. I opened the door and wifey was dressed up and ready to go. Whoa, wifey is never ready…so she must have a plan.

“Want to go to Walnut Creek and walk around?”

This phrase translates to “Want to watch me walk into a bunch of stores that play terrible techno music while you eat food that you bought from the food court?”

“Sure.” My mind started to wander as I imagined what tasty treats I would eat that day.

And awesome it was, we spent hours walking, laughing, and enjoying each others company. But, the question came up…the question that causes us to stop for 45 minutes…and do research…and stand there and do nothing.

“Where do you want to eat?”

Look, I’m good with eating random junk food. Cinnabon? Yes. Wetzel’s Pretzels? Oh yes. But an actual meal, whoa let’s hold our horses and not count our chickens before they hatch..or however that phrase goes. We stop walking, check our surroundings…and check yelp reviews. Finally, we choose a spot and sit down to eat. I order a burger. And I could easily describe it as “meh.” So if you asked me, “Hey, how was that burger you had?” I would say, “meh.” So I was not impressed…but if you are wondering, yes I ate it all. Because why? I didn’t want to waste money.

My taste buds would not be disappointed that night, though. I tried Pinkberry for the first time. No, it’s not some kind of drug, silly goose. It’s a frozen yogurt place. And nothing is more manly than frozen yogurt, am I right?

...I miss it already.

…I miss it already.

Hey, I am just going to say it. I love frozen yogurt places, ok? There is nothing wrong with the love between a man…and frozen yogurt topped with all kinds of goodies like cheesecake..and mochi. It was delicious….and it did not last long. Wait, we are still talking about frozen yogurt right?

The next day was July 4th..or the Foodth of July. It is an exciting day filled with celebration…and bad foods to eat. Our Bffs came over and we played Cards against Humanity. If you have not heard of this game, please google it. It is amazing, inappropriate, hilarious, and you kinda bond a little with your fellow players. Well, basically, it’s a card game with random questions…and random answers. One person picks a question card, and every other person picks an answer card. The person who picked the question card picks their favorite answer from the pile of other person’s answers. Sounds simple right?

Cards Against Humanity

Cards Against Humanity

But…it can be a lot more inappropriate than that.

The fireworks came next…and the kids could barely contain themselves. We found a great spot and watched our kids play with sparklers…watched illegal fireworks..and it all ended too fast.

Bug and Jonah underneath the illegal fireworks.

Bug and Jonah underneath the illegal fireworks.


11 thoughts on “The Foodth of July

  1. Pink berry looks great! Have not had frozen yogurt in a while.. I was stuck on Cold Stone Creamery for a while, talk about crack!! Oh man!! Glad your 4th was great!

  2. I bought cards against humanity last year and totally forgot I had until I read this! They’re still unopened! I’m guessing u can’t play with the kids????

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