Seeing people in regular clothes can be boring. So, last week we decided to go to the Renaissance Fair.
(Personal note: I love anything that has to do with this time period. Dragons…knights saving damsels in distress…renegade archers saving peasants from rich nobles who are up to no good…)
I hopped in my horse and carriage with my queen and princess and headed towards the local caffeine watering hole(Starbucks’s).
“Huzzah, my fair queen…I bid thee…what dost you desire from this fair rectangular screen that asks us what we want-eth to drink-eth?”
“…stop. The usual…extra shot of espresso if you are going to talk like that all day.”
“..Huzzah…and for the fair maiden in the back? Your finest milk from your most noble cow mixed with chocolate….and a croissant…with chocolate in-eth it…eth.”
And two hours later, we parked at the faire. We geeked out on the elaborate costumes. There were knights, fairies, executioners, pirates, and peasants. But, it was hard to focus on all that…it was way too hot. The temperature was over 100 degrees and air conditioning did not exist during the renaissance era. And we noticed something else too, the renaissance era is EXPENSIVE. You want a mug made of wood…800 shillings please(80 dollars)…how about a small fake shield for your little knight in training, please pull out 40 bucks. And what about the rides? You see that porch swing with a guy dressed up as a peasant pushing it to make it move? Yeah, that’s five bucks.
“…prithee, what is the cost of thy finest fish with fries from the french? By my troth! That is muy cray cray…pardon us, whilst we take our leave.”
I know what you are thinking.
“Whoa, Dan. I don’t think they used the phrase ‘cray-cray’ during that time…and didn’t you mix in some spanish there?”
And I would say, “Yes, you are very inquisitive. And yes, I did mix some spanish in there…and I am sure you are impressed with my spanish speaking skills. Spanish 4 for the win….well, you really shouldn’t be too impressed, everyone knows what ‘muy’ means…you give me way too much credit my friend.”
A few hours later, we needed to find shade and a place to sit. And prepared to watch a show with knights jousting. This is where the real fun began. My little one loved it, she cheered for her section’s knight and worried for his safety during the sword fight.
After the show, we decided to head towards a present day marketplace…a shopping mall. Goodbye to booths selling chalices and medieval jewelry…fare thee well to stands carving up wooden swords and bows….and hello to air conditioning…fast food…and shopping bags with with goodies for wifey.